Thanks for being patient everyone. Please see below for all service information for Van. More information to follow as it comes to us but here is what we have as of now.
Please use GOOGLE MAPS and NOT Mapquest when getting directions. Mapquest directions are incorrect.
Funeral Services Info:
Saturday, January 31st at 2pm
Episcopal Church of the Blessed Sacrament
1314 N Angelina Drive
Placentia, CA 92870
714-528-2995
www.bsacramentchurch.org
Burial following the ceremony at Memory Garden Memorial Park and Mortuary
455 W Central Avenue
Brea, CA 92821
714-529-3961
www.memorygarden.com
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Monday, January 26, 2009
Van - Monday, January 26th, 2009
Heartbroken is the only word I can use for how I am feeling right now. Well that is the dominant one. Others would be confused, angry, dumfounded...so many more. Van, one of my best friends passed away on what looks like Saturday night. I don’t even know what to think right now. How could this 29 year old kid with so much life, happiness and energy be gone from our lives? Nothing makes sense right now except for the fact that Van is gone and we have to accept and deal with it. Do you know how difficult that is when you are talking about someone like Van? This was a 29 year old kid who all of us yesterday just kept looking at the door expecting him to walk through yelling, “Just kidding guys”. But obviously that never happened.
So the point of this message is twofold. One is because I just need to get my thoughts down somewhere. I can’t articulate anything verbally so I guess I’ll try this. The other purpose is to let you all know what we know because Van had great friends on both coasts and across the country and it’s only right that everyone knows what happened, as far as we know this morning. What I can tell you as of now is that Van passed away peacefully on Saturday night in his home. It will be up to his family and Staci to decide how much information they want to release beyond that, but I think it’s important for everyone to know that he did pass quickly, peacefully and with no pain.
Personally, I am wrecked. I just don’t know what to do. Everyone reading this blog knows what I have been battling with for the past 8 months, but what they don’t know is the role Van had played in my recovery. Without hesitation or question I can say that Van was there EVERY time I needed him and he put me and my well being ahead of himself. That includes weekdays, weekends, mornings, afternoons, nights, didn’t matter. If he was in town and I needed anything, Van was there with a smile on his face not even questioning why he was there, just happy to be there. He was team captain for the Light the Night Walk event in which we raised close to $15k and that was all his doing. If he was out of town, it hurt him that he wasn’t there for me. That is the kind of person Van was to me personally. I will never forget his spirit, his desire to help and most of all his absolute heart of gold. I know there are stories like this with just about everyone who was fortunate enough to have Van touch their lives, this is mine. There is so much I am going to miss about him it’s not even worth listing, but that list is going to grow every day that guy isn’t in my life and it kills me to even think about it. I lost a brother on Saturday night along with a lot of other people and we’re going to have to find a way to get through this, no matter how impossible or hard it might seem. One thing I know is that Van wouldn’t want us wallowing around in our own self pity. Sorry Van, this one is going to hurt for a while so I can’t make you any promises, but I’ll try.
We’ll figure out the best way to get more information out about services, etc. I’m not sure if this is the best avenue for that or not, but feel free to check back here until we do get it figured out. Again, this will be up to Van’s family and Staci.
Van, from the bottom of my heart and everyone you touched, we will miss you my friend, very much.
The family has asked in lieu of flowers, Van would want all donations in his name to go to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. This is something Van started upon my diagnosis and his family feels he would like to see his work continued:
Donate by email: http://www.leukemia-lymphoma.org Look for "How to help" section on left side of screen towards the middle/then click on "Donate"/click on "online donations" (first bullet middle of screen)/fill out form- designate your donation "in memory of":
Van Skoglund
5973 Calle Cuervo
Yorba Linda, CA 92887
OR
Donate by Phone - Call (800) 955-4572
If the donation is in memory or honor of a loved one and you would like an acknowledgement card sent to a family member informing them of your donation, please provide Van’s full name and address (above).
So the point of this message is twofold. One is because I just need to get my thoughts down somewhere. I can’t articulate anything verbally so I guess I’ll try this. The other purpose is to let you all know what we know because Van had great friends on both coasts and across the country and it’s only right that everyone knows what happened, as far as we know this morning. What I can tell you as of now is that Van passed away peacefully on Saturday night in his home. It will be up to his family and Staci to decide how much information they want to release beyond that, but I think it’s important for everyone to know that he did pass quickly, peacefully and with no pain.
Personally, I am wrecked. I just don’t know what to do. Everyone reading this blog knows what I have been battling with for the past 8 months, but what they don’t know is the role Van had played in my recovery. Without hesitation or question I can say that Van was there EVERY time I needed him and he put me and my well being ahead of himself. That includes weekdays, weekends, mornings, afternoons, nights, didn’t matter. If he was in town and I needed anything, Van was there with a smile on his face not even questioning why he was there, just happy to be there. He was team captain for the Light the Night Walk event in which we raised close to $15k and that was all his doing. If he was out of town, it hurt him that he wasn’t there for me. That is the kind of person Van was to me personally. I will never forget his spirit, his desire to help and most of all his absolute heart of gold. I know there are stories like this with just about everyone who was fortunate enough to have Van touch their lives, this is mine. There is so much I am going to miss about him it’s not even worth listing, but that list is going to grow every day that guy isn’t in my life and it kills me to even think about it. I lost a brother on Saturday night along with a lot of other people and we’re going to have to find a way to get through this, no matter how impossible or hard it might seem. One thing I know is that Van wouldn’t want us wallowing around in our own self pity. Sorry Van, this one is going to hurt for a while so I can’t make you any promises, but I’ll try.
We’ll figure out the best way to get more information out about services, etc. I’m not sure if this is the best avenue for that or not, but feel free to check back here until we do get it figured out. Again, this will be up to Van’s family and Staci.
Van, from the bottom of my heart and everyone you touched, we will miss you my friend, very much.
The family has asked in lieu of flowers, Van would want all donations in his name to go to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. This is something Van started upon my diagnosis and his family feels he would like to see his work continued:
Donate by email: http://www.leukemia-lymphoma.org Look for "How to help" section on left side of screen towards the middle/then click on "Donate"/click on "online donations" (first bullet middle of screen)/fill out form- designate your donation "in memory of":
Van Skoglund
5973 Calle Cuervo
Yorba Linda, CA 92887
OR
Donate by Phone - Call (800) 955-4572
If the donation is in memory or honor of a loved one and you would like an acknowledgement card sent to a family member informing them of your donation, please provide Van’s full name and address (above).
Friday, January 16, 2009
Day + 86
The proverbial light at the end of the tunnel has arrived and my appetite is back. I can’t tell you how good it feels to be hungry again. How it feels to enjoy the food you are eating rather than trying your hardest just to keep it down. How nice it is to look forward to eating rather than dreading your next meal. It is so difficult to put into words how terrible this appetite thing is unless you have lived it or seen in first hand with someone you love or care for. And it’s amazing how this one issue just completely ruined me. Now that my appetite is back I feel like a new man. I am slowly putting weight back on but more than that, I’m just starting to feel like myself again which is something I have missed for quite some time. I’m sure anyone close to me can verify that. I feel like talking to people again, going out for walks, catching up on idol work that has been sitting around because of my total lack of motivation, etc. It just amazes me that all of those things are related to the fact that my appetite and just overall eating habits were so out of whack, and now it’s back and I feel like a new man.
On the medical side of things all is well. My blood counts continue to hover exactly where they should be, to the point that my doctor has now lowered my required hospital visits to one day per week as opposed to twice a week. If you remember I started out with going to the hospital three times per week, so this means things are on track on the medical side and progressing according to plan.
So that’s about it. Things are going very well and I feel great which is great news for Evey who now gets to take a break from trying to get food down my throat on a daily basis. Poor girl, but at least it’s over for now. It’s so funny how things can turn on a dime so quickly. I remember about 3 weeks ago I was meeting with my doctor and told him with no joke in my voice that I truly felt like I was falling apart. I had no appetite and was losing weight, my feet absolutely killed me due to a condition caused by chemotherapy where the nerve endings in my feet get all messed up, I had zero motivation to do anything and my personality just seemed like it was turning dark. This was 3 weeks ago. He looked at me, we addressed each “issue” I was experiencing and he told me “One morning you are going to wake up and you will just feel good. There is no explanation around it except that it will happen”. At the time that meant nothing to me given the state I was in. At that point in time I seriously had forgotten what it felt like to feel good, or even average. It’s a terrible feeling when you can’t even remember what it’s like to feel average. Well, I’m happy to say that I am there and that morning has arrived and what a great morning every morning is when you feel like this. Whether it’s short lived or this is my road going forward, I don’t care. I am living up these good times and loving the fact that I feel like Kurt again. Take care everyone and we’ll talk again soon. Look for me at the Laker game tonight. I’ll be the one in purple and gold.
On the medical side of things all is well. My blood counts continue to hover exactly where they should be, to the point that my doctor has now lowered my required hospital visits to one day per week as opposed to twice a week. If you remember I started out with going to the hospital three times per week, so this means things are on track on the medical side and progressing according to plan.
So that’s about it. Things are going very well and I feel great which is great news for Evey who now gets to take a break from trying to get food down my throat on a daily basis. Poor girl, but at least it’s over for now. It’s so funny how things can turn on a dime so quickly. I remember about 3 weeks ago I was meeting with my doctor and told him with no joke in my voice that I truly felt like I was falling apart. I had no appetite and was losing weight, my feet absolutely killed me due to a condition caused by chemotherapy where the nerve endings in my feet get all messed up, I had zero motivation to do anything and my personality just seemed like it was turning dark. This was 3 weeks ago. He looked at me, we addressed each “issue” I was experiencing and he told me “One morning you are going to wake up and you will just feel good. There is no explanation around it except that it will happen”. At the time that meant nothing to me given the state I was in. At that point in time I seriously had forgotten what it felt like to feel good, or even average. It’s a terrible feeling when you can’t even remember what it’s like to feel average. Well, I’m happy to say that I am there and that morning has arrived and what a great morning every morning is when you feel like this. Whether it’s short lived or this is my road going forward, I don’t care. I am living up these good times and loving the fact that I feel like Kurt again. Take care everyone and we’ll talk again soon. Look for me at the Laker game tonight. I’ll be the one in purple and gold.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Day + 79
Here we are at day 79 since my transplant and at times it feels like yesterday. Sometimes that's a good thing and other times it's not so good. I had this vision in my head that my recovery would be completely linear and as time progressed, so would my recovery. Things couldn't be further from reality. What I have found is that my road to recovery has left turns, right turns, sometimes u-turns, hills, valleys...the whole deal. These turns, hills and valleys manifest themselves in random pains, nausea, complete loss of appetite, weight fluctuation; the list could go on and on. My point to all this, is now that I know my recovery isn't going to follow a straight line, time does not necessarily equal get better; I think I'll be better equipped to handle this stuff in 2009. At least that's what I'm going with.
My counts are all looking good as usual and in fact, I may even be able to start pulling back on some of the key anti-rejection medications. If that turns into a trend and we continue to pull back on more of these meds that would be huge. One thing I really want to get away from is all of these medications and this could hopefully be a start to that.
Some more good news which is actually pretty funny to me is my hair is starting to grow back. But it's like fuzzy little baby hair. Evey and I are getting a kick out of it. I can joke about it all I want, but in reality it feels pretty damn good. It is visual proof that my body is moving on and recovering from the poison of the chemo and radiation. As I said in my last message or a couple of messages back, the small victories are what count and the fact that this one is tangible makes it even better.
Now I just need to get my weight up. I'm not sure if any of you have experienced what it feels like to not have any appetite, ever. It is miserable, especially when you NEED to get your weight up for obvious health reasons. Right now I am about 25 pounds underweight, and any kind of food at any given time of the day just sounds terrible. What do you do when just the thought of food makes you sick? Well, the first thing you do is force down what you have to, at least to maintain your weight. The last thing you want to do is to lose more weight. Let me tell you first hand that this is torture, especially coming from someone who loves food. It’s like a terrible curse. Anyway, I spoke with my doctor about it and he gave me some liquid medication to help with my appetite. I've been on it now for the past 4 days and that with Evey's non-stop cooking and putting food in front of me, it seems to be working. I've gained 3 pounds back this last week and feel like I can keep more food down than before so I feel like I'm on the right track.
That's about it for now. As you can see I'm still in the thick of the fight and the last month or so has been a huge challenge both mentally and physically, but progress is being made. Thanks for sticking with me…
My counts are all looking good as usual and in fact, I may even be able to start pulling back on some of the key anti-rejection medications. If that turns into a trend and we continue to pull back on more of these meds that would be huge. One thing I really want to get away from is all of these medications and this could hopefully be a start to that.
Some more good news which is actually pretty funny to me is my hair is starting to grow back. But it's like fuzzy little baby hair. Evey and I are getting a kick out of it. I can joke about it all I want, but in reality it feels pretty damn good. It is visual proof that my body is moving on and recovering from the poison of the chemo and radiation. As I said in my last message or a couple of messages back, the small victories are what count and the fact that this one is tangible makes it even better.
Now I just need to get my weight up. I'm not sure if any of you have experienced what it feels like to not have any appetite, ever. It is miserable, especially when you NEED to get your weight up for obvious health reasons. Right now I am about 25 pounds underweight, and any kind of food at any given time of the day just sounds terrible. What do you do when just the thought of food makes you sick? Well, the first thing you do is force down what you have to, at least to maintain your weight. The last thing you want to do is to lose more weight. Let me tell you first hand that this is torture, especially coming from someone who loves food. It’s like a terrible curse. Anyway, I spoke with my doctor about it and he gave me some liquid medication to help with my appetite. I've been on it now for the past 4 days and that with Evey's non-stop cooking and putting food in front of me, it seems to be working. I've gained 3 pounds back this last week and feel like I can keep more food down than before so I feel like I'm on the right track.
That's about it for now. As you can see I'm still in the thick of the fight and the last month or so has been a huge challenge both mentally and physically, but progress is being made. Thanks for sticking with me…
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Day + 71
Hi everyone,
I am going to keep this message short and sweet and just say HAPPY NEW YEAR and thank you. Each and every one of you holds a special place in my heart. I want to thank you for your messages of encouragement over the last week specifically…you know who you are. It has been quite a year and all I (we) can do is wave good-bye to the past and look forward to a great 2009.
So again, HAPPY NEW YEAR my friends and spread the good word that this good forsaken year is over and it's time to start a new one. Thanks for reading and we'll catch up again soon. -Kurt
I am going to keep this message short and sweet and just say HAPPY NEW YEAR and thank you. Each and every one of you holds a special place in my heart. I want to thank you for your messages of encouragement over the last week specifically…you know who you are. It has been quite a year and all I (we) can do is wave good-bye to the past and look forward to a great 2009.
So again, HAPPY NEW YEAR my friends and spread the good word that this good forsaken year is over and it's time to start a new one. Thanks for reading and we'll catch up again soon. -Kurt
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